Good friends are hard to find

They really are. It dawned on me last night, during a conversation with a very good friend, that there are only a handful of people in your life that really, really get you. I've heard somewhere before that most people can count the number of true friends that they have on one hand.

You know the friends I'm talking about....the friend that will listen for hours while you snivel about your stupid ass boyfriend and his clueless behavior; the friend that will come and pick you up after a night at the bar no matter what time it is; the friend that will help you move into a new place; the friend that is at your birthday parties year after year; the friend that knows your family and still loves you; the friend that will drop everything to go out drinking with you on a moment's notice, and then hold your hair back while you puke later that same night; the friend that doesn't get upset when you don't call back; the friend whose house you retreat to when you just need to feel comfort.

It seems that as we've matured, we've grown into this comfortable, semi-adult friendship, where the little shit no longer matters. We realize that sometimes our lives may go in different directions for a little while - when a new guy comes into the picture, when work makes the transition from just a job to a career, when others need you more than they do. But in our hearts, we know that this does nothing to change the friendship. We know that no matter what, when it comes down to it, those people are going to be there for us when we most need it. We may not talk for weeks, but when that first conversation takes place after a long absence, it feels like they've never left.

At one point in my life, there was a group of friends who used to fight like cats and dogs, constantly bickering and backstabbing and exuding general bitchiness at one point or another. I admit, I had many of the same behaviours. But when it started to affect my life, when I felt like I had to watch what I said to everyone, and the drama and stress levels were just too high, I stepped back. I removed myself from the situation. At first I was like a fish out of water....even though those 'friends' were bringing me down, they had been in my life for years. But it really was one of the best things for me. I no longer have to worry what I say, or if someone is going to get mad at me for something I've done.

My true friends now accept me for who I am, and the only time they talk about me is when they have genuine concern for me. I never have to worry about them getting mad at me, unless it's for something that I royally screwed up on, and then I know that I deserve it. But that rarely happens between any of us. We live our lives, whether they are intertwined or not, but we're always together.

Ladies, I look forward to growing old together, no matter where life takes us...and one day we can sit and laugh when our daughters fight with their friends, and when we tell them that real friends don't do that, we'll know just how true it is.

~ to the friend who inspired this post (you know who you are), I love you...but you knew that already! ~