End of an era

Well, I finally made that step. That final step towards moving on and closure.

I had the conversation with my ex and told him that it was time for him to move on, and out. It didn't' go as smoothly as I had thought at first. It was pretty ugly, to tell you the truth.

He was hurt, shocked, upset.....god knows what else. BUT....it's been nearly 3 months since we split, and living together is just not working anymore. For me at least. He seems to think that everything was going fine, and that I shouldn't be in a rush to move on.

Here's the thing....I AM in a rush to move on. Not onto another relationship, I just want to close that part of my life and move on to the next chapter. There is nothing wrong with doing that. For the first time in my life, I was strong for ME, and me alone. And it felt great. I stood my ground, did not let myself get guilted or bullied into changing my mind or made to feel bad.

It was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. I still love him, but I am so far from being in love with him, and I know he will always be in my life in some form or another, as we value each other's friendship. It was very sad to make that first step towards complete separation.

But, it's been done, and the ugliness turned into acceptance after a few hours of cooling down. He's made peace with it, and with me. And will be leaving in about a month.

So that means one more step, him actually moving out....I'm sure there will be more tears, and it will hurt some more. But we're on the road to getting over one another finally.

And it feels kinda good. Sad, but good.