The little things

A new friend told me yesterday that "kissing is the lifeblood of passion"........that statement has been bouncing around in my head since I read it.

I realized that I have never met anyone who has been able to satisfy my kissing appetite. I love to kiss. It is a big, huge thing for me. Not just as a prequel to sex, either. It is just a very close and intimate thing to me.

Some of my closest moments have been gazing into someone's eyes, locking lips. Feeling their breathing, seeing right into their eyes, holding their face in your hands....how much more intimate can you get? And yes, some of you might think that actual sex is more intimate than a deep soulful kiss, but not in my mind.

The point of this was not to ramble on about how to kiss, but more to ponder why in some relationships, kissing is just not present all that much. I've been in such a relationship at one point in my life, and it killed me. Really took a destructive swing at my self confidence. All I could think of was WHY does this person not want to kiss me? What is so wrong that they wouldn't want to experience something as good as that?

But really, it's all about the little things to me, not just the passionate kisses...the glances across a crowded room, the grazing touches as you walk past each other, the little kisses on your forehead, the stupid little notes left in places where you least expect them, saving the last bite of food so that you can try it too.

I miss these things. I haven't had them in years, but I pine for them now even more as I meet people that could potentially do those things for me. It scares me in a way....do those things endure the tests of a relationship? Or do they go away as time flies by? I have yet to find out....and I'm not too sure if I want to. Maybe not having them for so long was a blessing?

Nah, who am I kidding? I want those things again....not anytime soon, but in my future, there will be a loooooong list of things like that to live up to for some lucky guy. And I know that there's a guy out there that can do those things.

He better be a damn good kisser as well. Knock-my-socks off kinda good. Take-my-breathe-away kinda good. Make-me-want-to-tear-his-clothes-off-from-just-one-kiss kinda good.

Oh, yes....that good.